Support and Advice from TNPC's Parenting Experts

What are some good reasons for your teenager to say no to sex?

You might tell him or her:

1. “Hold off if you don’t know each other well.” The best sexual sharing comes with someone you know and trust. Why do it with someone who isn’t special to you?

2. “The risk of sexually transmitted diseases is a very good reason to say no to sex right now.” Besides the risk of AIDS, there are a number of other sexually transmitted diseases that can threaten both your health and your future fertility in addition to your dignity. You risk sexually transmitted diseases if you’re sexually active, especially if you have more than one partner, and have sex without using a condom, or not making sure your partner does. It’s smart to consider these risks.

3. “If you don’t know much about sex, slow down.” Read, take a sex education course, talk with your parents. Become a theoretical expert first.

4. Finally, “If you’re tempted to have sex for non-sexual reasons, STOP.” Sex will not make you wiser, more mature, truly popular, or loved. It will not boost your self esteem. If you have sex to get what only you can give yourself, you’ll be disappointed.

An expert in the field of adolescent behavior, Ms. McCoy has authored eleven books on the subject including the best selling “The Teenage Body Book”. Additionally she has written hundreds of articles for major national magazines. Coordinator of the Clinical Ph.D. Program at California School of Professional Psychology and Staff Counselor at the Center for Individual and Family Counseling in North Hollywood, California.


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